- They Forgot To Put Hot Sauce Packets With My Order Even Though I Specifically Asked For Them.
- There's Not Enough Time In The Day...Yet, I'm On Facebook.
- My Car Doesn't Play Cds, Only Cassette Tapes.
- It's Humid Out And My Thumbs Are Sticking Across My Touch Screen.
- When Your Alarm Doesn't Go Off.
- When You Had Sex...But It Was Only A Dream.
- When I Torrent A Song, It Doesn't Come With The Artwork.
- My Life Is Just Freaking Awkward.
- We Have Too Much Food In Our Freezer So When We Open It Stuff Falls Out.
- I Retied One Of My Shoes Too Tight. Now I Have To Retie The Other One.
- Sometimes The Commercials On Tv Are Louder Than The Show, So I Have To Make It Softer And Then Louder Everytime.
- Whenever I See A Tap, I Immediately Stick My Hands Under Them, Even If They're Not Automatic.
- My Favorite Band Just Broke Up!!!
- Cutting Myself While Shaving.
- I Had To Walk Up The Escalator.
- Ahh, I Slept On My Neck. The Pain!
- My Laptop Feels Too Warm On My Knees When I Use It In Bed.
- I Have To Many Notifications.
- I Have Over 1000 Channels, And Yet...There's Nothing On Tv!
- The Volume On The Video I'm Watching Is Too Low And I Can't Turn It Up Anymore.
- My Mouse Used To Click Much Louder.
- I Don't Know How To Play The Guitar.
- Parking Lot Near My Destination Was Full. Now I Have To Park A Block Away And Walk.
- Why Do I Always Wake Up Tired And Fall Asleep Wide Awake.
- My Garage Door Opener Didn't Work When I Got Home, So I Had To Park My Car Outside. Where It Rains.
- Type In User Name. Notice Typo 1/10 Second After Hitting Enter.
- Downloads New Songs For Road Trip Play List. Forgets To Sync Ipod To Computer.
- Buying A New Dvd. Tons Of Unskippable Warnings And Previews.
- Record Your Voice Just For The Hell Of It. Think: "I Really Sound That Bad?"
- Buy New Sneakers. Don't Even Want To Wear Them Outside. They're In Perfect Condition.
- Grab A Tissue To Sneeze.Don't Have To Sneeze Anymore.
- Load The Toothbrush With Paste. Tilt Hand Slightly, Paste Plops Off Into Sink.
- One Pillow Isn't Enough. Two Pillows Is Just Too Much.
- Laptop Ran Out Of Battery.Had To Go Upstairs To Find The Charger.
- Bought To Many Groceries At The Supermarket. Have To Make Two Trips To Get Them All Inside.
- Filling Out A Job Application. I Have To Print.
- Going To Ride Bicycle To The Gym. It Started Raining So Now Have To Drive Car.
- Hotel Made Up For Delayed Check In With Chocolate Covered Strawberries. Have No Fridge. So Had To Eat Them.
- Alone In My Office. Hear Something From Other Room.
- Bought My First $.00 App. It Keeps Crashing
- Trying To Download An Ebook From My Library. Got The Audiobook Instead.
- When I Was A Child, Shaving Once Every Month Was To Cool. Now That I Need To Shave Every Morning It Isn't So Fun...
- Didn't Get On Facebook For Two Days. Miss An Invite To A Party.
- My Friend Fluncked
- All My Passwords Are On Autocomplete, So I Don't Know What They Are Anymore.
- 2 And A Half Minutes To Microwave My Food Is An Intolerable Amount Of Time When I'm Busy On The Internet.
- My Pizza Box Is Too Awkwardly-Shaped For My Trash Can.
- When I Take A Shower, The Shower Curtain Always Gets Blown Inward And Touches Me
- I'm Broke, I've Lived Through 3 Years Of Drought, And Nearly All Of My Livestock Have
- Died. Life Is Difficult In Farmville.
Monday, December 23, 2013
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